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31st May 2012

robertr48366:48pm: What NOT to do in an accident
Coming home on a two lane road 50 MPH speed limit when traffic slows to a crawl for an accident ahead. Four or five cars, looks like one person wasn't paying attention and slammed into the slowing/stopping car in front of him causing a domino effect. I swear the lack of common sense in the general population is astounding...and I'm not even talking about the idiot that caused the accident!

Stupid #1) If you are in an accident, there is only cosmetic damage to your car and you are OK enough to walk around animatedly talking on your cell phone then it might be a good idea not to leave your car sticking half in the road and half in the breakdown lane. See those other people who pulled all the way into the breakdown lane? The fact that it was the guy who rear ended everyone and caused the accident in the first place was just icing on the cake.

Stupid #2) If you are a witness to the accident and want to be a good Samaritan and stick around that's great! That's awesome! It can really help the innocent victims with their insurance companies having an independent witness. Please, if you were coming from the opposite direction at the time, do NOT park in the breakdown lane directly opposite from the accident. Pull up a ways or turn around and join the party, don't help to narrow down the constricted roadway. For the love of GOD don't park in the breakdown lane DIRECTLY opposite from the idiot who left his car in the road.

Stupid #3) In spite of #1 and #2 there was actually plenty of room for two cars (SUV's, 18 wheelers) to pass each other comfortably and I was surprised at how slow it was going. I blamed it on rubberneckers until I got close enough to see Moron. Moron always wanted to be a traffic cop and he saw this as the perfect opportunity. Moron was standing directly in the middle of the narrowest section of the road alternately waving his arms at East bound and then at West bound traffic trying to get by him. Instead of having to navigate between a car half in the road and on-coming traffic or a car parked in the breakdown lane and on-coming traffic we get to navigate between a car half in the road and Moron or a car in the break down lane and Moron.

X-Posted to Bad_Driving

8th August 2011

iamcyber3:09pm: WTH?
I know how fast I'M going...so therefore there is NO WAY how fast YOU are going is the least bit legal. There are two other lanes on the expressway and traffic is light so there's NO reason you should be tailgaiting me, flashing your brights at me, honking and swearing at me when I'm NOT in the fastest-moving lane.

That's right, TRUCK, I'm talking to YOU. BACK THE F*CK OFF!! Maybe you should remember to use your turn signals and follow the rules of the road instead of weaving in and out of traffic as well. Get a big ole CLUE BY FOUR from the dump truck that the State Trooper had pulled over with the cowl open, inspecting for concealed items and ACT LIKE YOU'RE A PROFESSIONAL, NOT A PROFESSIONAL A-HOLE!

(NOTE - for all of the truck drivers out there who DO NOT drive like this, THANK YOU for your professionalism!)
Current Mood: pissed off

18th April 2011

robertr48362:33pm: Two Stories
I'm heading south on a two lane road approaching an intersection with red lights. I'm in the middle lane with the left lane being a left turn only leading to two streets on the left, a sharp left turn and a shallow left turn. The guy in front of me puts on his left blinker and enters the left turn lane. He then immediately puts his right blinker on and I slow to let him back into the middle lane.

The light turns green while the left turn arrow remains red. As soon as this guy passes the cars in the left turn lane that he almost pulled in behind he puts his left blinker on again and shoots across two lanes of on-coming northbound traffic to make the shallow left turn.

Honestly I don't know if:

1) He thought he needed to make a left, then changed his mind and decided he needed to go straight and then at the last minute he decided he really did need to go left and felt the best way to take care of this was by playing chicken with oncoming traffic while running a red light (as opposed to, I don't know...going straight and then turning around when it is safe to do so).


2) He ignored all the clear signage and decided the left turn lane was ONLY for the sharp left turn and to take the shallow left you had to bypass the left turn only lane and then it's a free-for-all.

To the rather large angry woman with a bag full of food outside a McDonald's:

I understand that you are upset that my car is a mere few inches from the side of your car so that you can not access your drivers side door. I understand that you did not want to try to access your car from the passenger side and slide over and that consequently you had to wait several minutes for me to get done with what I was doing and come out to leave. What I do not understand is why you are upset at ME? See, you parked your car about a half foot into the only other available spot in the entire small parking lot so that when I parked I really didn't have much choice about how close my car was to yours. See those white lines? If you park between them (see my car for an example) you won't have this problem. The only one you should be upset with is yourself. I understand but I am not really sorry at all and I did like the look on your face when I responded to your tirade with a simple, "Sounds like a personal problem to me."

10th April 2011

iamcyber3:40pm: Bicycle Safety
If you're going to go for a bike ride on a lovely warm day, please bear in mind that you must follow the same rules of the road as the cars traveling alongside of you.

...that includes not running a red light on a BUSY street with your wife(?) and kids in tow. People around here quite often exceed the speed limit (which is 45mph on that road) and seldom stop for someone like you.

...and drivers, when there is a bicycle lane adjacent to where you are parking, check your mirror before you open your car door. My good friend really did NOT appreciate the broken collarbone someone gave her because they didn't look first and opened their door right when she was passing by...and got off scot-free from any charges.
Current Mood: chipper

27th January 2011

iamcyber5:05pm: Dear Stupid...
...wake up and get a clue. The schoolbus you were tailgaiting put its turn signal on because it was actually TURNING into a neighborhood to pick up more children. Having to slam on your brakes and swerve to avoid hitting the bus is your own damned fault. Don't honk and scream at the bus driver for your own idiocy. The only way you got off without hitting anyone is that the rest of us around you saw your moronic driving and stayed away from the likes of you.

...I hope you enjoy driving a thoroughly rusted sh*tmobile. The GIANT sign on the plow / salt truck that says "KEEP BACK 50 FEET" doesn't mean "drive behind like you're chained to the rear trailer hitch." The sign is there MOSTLY for your safety so that the driver can see you...but also there to give most of the salt the chance to fall on the road, not your car!

16th December 2010

iamcyber10:55am: Bad Pedestrian
Wow, this guy had a death wish and a half!!!

The road:
- railroad crossing
- adjacent street lights burned out
- billboard illuminating crossing turned off

The pedestrian:
- wearing dark clothing
- hood on head blocking peripheral vision
- on cell phone so not paying attention

Dude was trying to cross the road ON THE TRACKS...there is a traffic signal, working street light and crosswalk 30 yards down the street that this guy could've safely crossed at. I and the other drivers only saw him when we got to the railroad crossing and all reacted with the same "Holy sh*t!" startle.

3rd December 2010

julifox4:50pm: Two today....
Grannie, I completely understand the logic behind backing partially out of that handicap spot that's right there by the driving lane and then proceeding into the driving lane, I really do. But you still have to yield to traffic already IN said driving lane, because you are pulling out of a parking spot. I know you didn't bother to look because I drive a big ol' SUV with my brights on during the day, and there's no way you can miss me if you actually look. You darned near hit me and it would have been your fault, not mine.

To the genius in my parking lot? The same applies doubly when you are BACKING OUT of a parking spot. YOU have to make sure that it's clear behind you BEFORE you back out. Like Granny earlier today, you obviously didn't even bother to look because there's no way you could have missed me if you had looked. And damned near hitting my truck and then yelling at me like it's my fault? Try again. You'd have been buying me a new front right quarter panel, dude. Get a clue, will ya?

26th November 2010

iamcyber1:24am: To the two state troopers lurking on the shoulder of the interstate...

...way to keep your public safe by a) opening your drivers' side door in heavy traffic while b) you've already got your tires on the white shoulder line...

...way to be even SAFER by both troopers cutting into traffic!!!

I'm glad I was well out of your way and the way of everyone else who had to swerve to avoid hitting the two of you.

5th October 2010

iamcyber8:14pm: Bad Driver Muse
To the mid-life crisis car driving guy I saw today...

...I hope you don't (insert expletive) like you drive. In and out and all over the place, halfway out of control.

Current Mood: amused

11th August 2010

julifox1:19pm: Wrong Way Driver, and Crosswalks
To the blonde bimbette who pulled away from the curb where you had been parked facing the wrong direction, and then proceeded to drive in the wrong lane, thereby nearly hitting me head on, and then flipped me off when I honked at you? *YOU* were the one facing the wrong direction and driving on the wrong side of the road. Therefore any resulting accident would have been *YOUR* fault. And I work for a really good attorney. Just sayin'.

Mods, please feel free to delete this part if it's not allowed, but it's one of my pet peeves, and I've seen way too much of it lately:

To those of you who partake of the bike/walking path that wends its way through our city? Those crosswalks are not carte blanche for you to just continue on your merry way without stopping to look for vehicles first. I dunno about you but my mother taught me to always look before crossing a street. I saw several near-misses today and have had a few myself. You'd better bet your butt that if I see someone get hit as a result of not bothering to look for and/or yield to traffic before running/walking/riding into the crosswalk, I'm gonna stop and give the police a statement as to what happened, and volunteer to testify in any resulting trials/lawsuits. I have seen parents do this with their little ones in tow. So not cool, y'all.

(Cross-posted to bad_driving and my personal journal)

10th August 2010

iamcyber10:24pm: A Disturbing Trend?
I certainly HOPE this is NOT a growing trend.

Lately, along with the "drive in the opposite lane from where you need to turn" trend has brought a blatant disregard for traffic control signs and signals.

In the past few days I and several fellow drivers around me have narrowly missed being T-boned or otherwise struck by people who have barrelled through intersections without stopping - when there was a stop sign or a red light that SHOULD have required them to stop.

The frightening part is that of the half a dozen or so narrow misses I've seen, only ONE person involved was distracted by their cell phone.

Has a portion of our fellow drivers developed a sudden death-wish??

25th June 2010

iamcyber2:01am: Ummm....
Did I miss a new law requiring a driver who intends to turn left at an upcoming intersection to drive in the far right lane (and vice versa for right turns) and not to require the use of one's turn signal in the process?

I dunno about you but when there is a grandmother with a small child riding in one of those pushalong Little Tykes car/wagon thingies is CLEARLY crossing the road, I think it's a VERY BAD idea to pull your behemoth SUV within a foot and a half of them while only paying attention to the cell phone you're yapping into.
Current Mood: angry

15th November 2009

mikeycpht3:04am: Lurking no more!
I usually only lurk here because I commute about 7 miles to and from where I work(ed) so nothing really to report happened. I gave my 2 weeks notice there and soon I will be joining the ranks of roadskoller and will have some stories to tell with pictures too. :)

19th October 2009

iamcyber12:47pm: 1. To whomever has an obsession with eating bananas every day on their way to work...do the world a favor and stop tossing your peels out of your car at the same off-ramp every day. Sooner or later, some unsuspecting driver with their window open will get a very NASTY surprise of angry bees that only seconds before, were covering the pile of peels you've been amassing. If you insist upon "recycling" them, create a compost heap in your own yard and offload them there. (thank heavens my drivers' side window motor doesn't work)

2. The sign overhead reads, "Trucks take longer to stop...don't cut them off." Well, I think the same should apply in reverse, especially when the cow-hauling truck who passed me AFTER tailgaiting me for a mile and a half, was doing in excess of 75mph. Don't cut off the old guy ahead of me who is doing the LEGAL SPEED LIMIT just so you can get your cows to whatever pasture or slaughterhouse they're destined for on time (or early for a bonus.)

3. Last time I checked, city buses were supposed to follow the same rules of the road as any other driver on the road alongside them. Bus? PICK A LANE! The broken white line designates that you drive on either side of it, not up the center of it.

To everyone else...beware of these folks on the road.

3rd August 2009

groovyraspberry11:11am: My favorite witness of a stupid driver.
It was December a couple of years ago, around 715 in the morning on the highway. I was in the slow lane, and there was only one other lane of traffic, the high speed lane.

We are just approaching an exit. A car in the right lane, without turn signal, speeds across in front of my car (almost causing me to crash into the stupid bastard) so they can take the exit. Stupidhead proceeds to speed into the exit lane, obviously too fast for such a sharp turn and flips her car into a huge snowbank.

AWWW!!!!!! I was so sad to see that!

27th June 2009

visionari9:40pm: A lot of fail for one driver
It was evening rush hour on the Friday before the holiday weekend.  Traffic was, therefore, even more congested than usual.  I don't know whether you were speeding, tailgating or both but either way, it doesn't really come as a surprise that when everyone slammed on the brakes, you were the only one who didn't manage to stop.

Unfortunately, the thing that finally brought you to a halt was my year-old car.  Thanks, Ace.

Oh, and being uninsured at the time you performed that particular bit of driving fail?  Genius.  Pure genius.

You cost me half my deductible but you've cost yourself more than 20 times that between fines, court costs and the suit my insurance company intends to file against you to recoup the cost of fixing my car, seeing as how the police report put the fault 100% on your shoulders.  Then there's the cost of fixing your own vehicle

But since you're going to lose your license for pretty much the rest of the year, your car can wait.

12th June 2009

insanefreeek3:38am: First off: BOTH lanes enter the freeway. This is indicated by the signs on the side of the road that you're SUPPOSED to be paying attention to. So. When it's the middle of rush hour, and the first lane (left) is backed up to get on, stop trying to edge yourself in and hold up the second lane. Really, you'd be saving yourself time, saving other people's time, and not almost causing pile-ups just because you HAVE TO GET OVER.

Secondly: After you do manage to get over, please at least keep up with the flow of traffic. I understand making a safety cushion, but when traffic is already going 40 in a 65, don't go 25 or less. Really.

On another note. Stop tailgaiting me. You had plenty of chances to pass me. First, there's a second lane, that's empty, to your left. When you seem to choose riding me instead, I then slowed down (5 mph) and pulled slightly into the shoulder. You know, the standard "Pass me" gesture. When you don't take these opportunities, I will become an asshole and take my foot off the gas pedal and if I reach 0, well, tough shit. You can stop honking now. You can STILL get in the other lane which has been empty for 5 minutes. The next exit or street you could even turn right on is a MILE DOWN THE ROAD, so you have no excuse not to do it. Really, it isn't that hard.

30th May 2009

iamcyber9:28pm: A few new Rules of the Road
** a sarcastic humorous perspective **
** disclaimer - this is strictly HUMOR and should in NO WAY be taken seriously or followed as law **

Seems that we must've missed the latest revision of the Rules of the Road where they have added a few new tweaks:

1. If someone is attempting to pull out of a driveway, you are required to pull into that lane and slow down.

2. The "ONLY" painted on the road means that you go here ONLY if you are NOT traveling the direction of the arrow.

3. The use of turn signals, especially for school buses and law enforcement agencies, is optional.

4. Trucks (sorry, roadskoller) may use all lanes, regardless of posted signage to use only designated lanes.

5. Driving at or below the posted speed limit in a construction zone is strictly forbidden. Drivers are required to keep up with the usual speed of traffic when no construction is taking place.

6. The "two-second rule" has been deemed as excessive following distance.

7. Driving at or below 15MPH over the posted speed limit is considered a traffic nuisance.

8. Pedestrians are considered a traffic nuisance and under no circumstances have the right-of-way.

9. Bicyclists may ride on any portion of the road, regardless of direction of traffic flow, and are exempt from any and all traffic laws.

10. It is acceptable to stop in or block any intersection, including railroad crossings.

3rd May 2009

aballard238:45pm: Dear new, and old, Oregonian residents.
The freeway was made to be driven on at speeds that are in excess of the normal 45mph speed limit on the best of roads, around here.

If you do not feel fit to drive ABOVE 45, please DO NOT ENTER THE FUCKING FREEWAY!

Also, if you feel the need to proceed at dangerously slow speeds onto a freeway that is obviously bellowing along at greater than 55mph, which is the posted speed limit, maybe you should.. pull off the road onto the shoulder, and take a big giant fucking breath.



Oh, also.

People that drive 60mph+ down 212? Yeah, you. Fucker, in your gigantic SUV or tiny suped up nastymobile. The speed limit on this road is 35 until AFTER you've hit the Evelyn St. light. It's not 60 ANYWHERE on this road, either. Your lack of caring about other people doesn't stop me driving the speed limit down the hill, however, and in the LEFT ZOMG SO FAST lane, to boot. Fuck you, you can wait behind my gigantic Explorer and I hope one of you fuckers gets pissed and rear ends me someday JUST so I can sue you for damages.

22nd April 2009

foxy_baby054:41pm: It's bad when it's a stranger, it's worse when it's family.
Dear Aunt,

Do you REALLY have to go zooming down Downtown at 50MPH? Seriously, not only could you have been caught by the cops, but you almost could have hurt my MOM. That's right. The one that was holding on for dear life next to you.

And all because you were scared to run out of gas? Please. There's like five gas stations you passed to get to my house. I would know, since I've lived here for almost two years. You could have just simply gotten your gas and THEN take Mom back home. Pull that with me in the car with Mom, and we will have some words.

No love,
Daughter of a Cancer survivor.
Current Mood: distressed

9th April 2009

foxy_baby054:35pm: Just today...
Teeny bit of background: I live about three blocks from the County Courthouse and approximately five from the bus station.

Story: My mom and I were crossing a street, where the sign for us to cross is blinking. One man was turning left, but he let us go by. And we were halfway across when this woman decides that she should turn right. WHILE THERE ARE PEOPLE CROSSING THE STREET. Which prompted Mom and I to literally tell her, "Learn how to drive." I added this: "Stay off the road, bitch." I have a slight temper, and this really was unsafe.

Dear driver,

If you see two people crossing a street, that does NOT give you the right to turn right almost in front of us. Unless you are blind as a bat (which you aren't), you can see the two people crossing. Pedestrians have the right of way, UNLESS we give you the way first (which DIDN'T happen). You are lucky you didn't hit my mother or me. I would have a good reason to knock you senseless.

Go back to Driver's Ed and take the test again. I think you failed and shouldn't have had your license to start with. Whoever was STUPID enough to let you drive should be knocked flat.

No love,
Current Mood: frustrated

18th March 2009

oneworldvision12:28pm: Too much green beer?
Will someone please explain to me the purpose of those "Baby On Board" signs? Are they really meant to be translated as "I can drive like an asshole and risk my kid's life, but dammit you had better be careful," or is there something I'm missing here?

Dear lady in the giant SUV with one of those ridiculous signs,

YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG. If you don't care enough about your kid's safety to, I don't know, not cut me off in order to cross two lanes of traffic, why even bother informing me of the little darling's presence? Instead of relying on total strangers to be mindful of your child's well-being, get off your damn phone and pay attention.

Also, one from a couple of weeks ago that I meant to post but didn't:

Dear hicks from out of state,

When getting on to the Turnpike, you are presented with a number of options that are clearly rather confusing. You can go north, or you can go south. You can also (as you in fact did) cut through six lanes of traffic in order to get to the southbound ramp. Fine, you're not from around here, maybe you didn't notice the giant signs stating which was which. Congratulations, you've managed to pick a direction -- but oh, no! You've still got one more decision to make before you can get on the Turnpike, and it's a tough one so pay attention: Are you driving a car, or a truck? Which type of vehicle are you sitting in right now? I promise, it's not a trick question. Take your time; in fact, feel free to continue blocking the entire ramp while you think about it. It's not like those of us behind you have anyplace to go. Seriously.

10th March 2009

iamcyber12:32am: Mergers
Um, for those of you who don't put on your turn signal until you're side-by-side with the car next to you...

...attempting to force the car next to you into oncoming traffic so you can merge into that lane is ILLEGAL and commonly viewed as aggressive driving tactics by most law enforcement agencies.

And no...I will not swerve into oncoming traffic when you continually try this tactic.

12th November 2008

iamcyber2:19am: New Drivers
We seem to have a couple of new breeds of drivers lately...do you?

1. Paranoid. The white line is optional, especially when cars wish to pass legally in the other lane - must drive straddling both lanes whenevver threatened by the notion of sharing the road with others.

2. s. l. o. w. Those who have had maybe just a few too many tickets lately and insist on driving about 15 miles UNDER the speed limit...this drop in speed increases exponentially when talking on a cellphone (see also Paranoid).

3. F-F-F-A-A-A-S-S-S-T-T-T-!-!-! Those who, even when you're going maybe a mile or two over the speed limit, whiz by you and the other drivers like you're sitting at a light and they have the right-of-way-all-the-time-in-their-lane on a 45MPH road.

4. Roadblock. Limited to (sorry, roadskoller) local truck drivers who KNOW that the cars around them are no match for their heavy and large machinery so any rules of the road (like signaling to turn and actually stopping to wait for the opposing traffic to pass) do not exist in their world.

5. Overload. The car/van with a few too many people inside - and never a mechanically-sound vehicle either...usually belching clouds of oil-burning chokey, sometimes bucking violently from a transmission issue and always weighted so heavily with passengers, it's a wonder the suspension system doesn't come protruding out of the fenders above.
Current Mood: perplexed
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